Today as never before it seems we are acutely aware of disposable things. That tendency seems to have effected many married couples as they fail to grasp the difference between phileo love and agape love. Phileo love is love that is contingent upon emotions. The “warm fuzzies”, for lack of better term keynotes this designation of love. Phileo love is the type that says “I will be kind to you, if you are kind to me”. However, since it is a self-oriented, feeling based love, if one receives negative feedback, then negative feedback is returned. Agape love, on the other hand, is quite different. Some have described it as colorless, irritating, and is quite frankly annoying. Why? Because agape love cares for the other person, even if when is not returned. Agape love lays the gauntlet down of doing an act of love, even when he/she may not appreciate it. That is tough stuff. I t seems to be what is spoken of in the Bible in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8. A healthy marriage has a foundation of agape love which allows for a generous supply of phileo.
What do you think?
That's a great point. I think of many people I know suffering in terrible relationships and all they want is to get out. But if they apply the "tough stuff" of agape love they would get better results.
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