Abandon and Stick Like Glue

There are an astounding number of married couples who do not seem to grasp the fact that once you are married significant changes occur. Some seem to feel their allegiance to the parents who raised them trumps the wishes of their spouse. Yet, Matthew 19:4-6 points out that at marriage a shift has occurred. It says, '"Haven't you read,' he [Jesus] replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,' and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh'? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate"' (NIV, bold added). Let's take a look at the two terms Jesus used.

The first word in Greek is kataleppsei.  " Leave" is better translated abandon. In other words, once a husband marries, he is to abandon the influence the parents who raised him and shift it for his wife. The term implies that in respect to the covenant of marriage the former child- parent relationship is altered.  In actuality that does not mean that the married couple is to have a lousy relationship with the husband's parents. Nevertheless, the union makes the former relationship changed forever. The new allegiance is to one's wife.

The other terms has the opposite meaning. Those words are translated with the one word in Greek which is proskollamai.  Proskollamai may be translated  "be united", but a better translation is stick like glue. In other words, these words reveal the marvelous transformation that takes place once a couple is married. After all, once married, the wife needs to look to her husband for strength, not her own parents.  Thus, a couple changes loyalty for all issues pertaining to their lives from parents to each other.

To bring it on home, one way of observing whether or not this transformation has taken place is to listen to the husband or wife as to when they go to visit their parents. If either say they are "going home", that may indicate they have not yet processed this metamorphosis God desires. The husband is to abandon his parents' control over his life, and his wife must look to her husband and not to her mom or dad as the most influential human on the face of the earth.

What do you think?